My shortcomings as a mother under stress


I think about this song and it makes me cry. I remember what a gift my children are and how compassionately i feel about their existence.

I pray my children have the grace to forgive my imperfections. You see, I have had a particularly difficult day. I won’t get into the particulars. It was just the kind of day that I feel as though i need to apologize to my children. I was tired, short-tempered, and rushed. Trying to cram in everything i felt i have been missing as necessary thing in their lives. It’s that damned list again. It was haunting me today. I saw the children in our neighborhood walking to school and felt compelled to cram a weeks worth of kindergarten into one day with my daughter in between two appointments and an apt with our lovely insurance provider. What was I thinking? Uh pride….yeah, pride in an ugly way. I am a homeschooler. But, really. Some days it just doesn’t happen that way. I feel as though I fail. You see, superwoman got thrown out the window. I chucked her out myself! But, there are a few days she climbs up to the second story window to rear her ugly head back into my world. she invades my happy place. my peace is my pace. my own individual slower pace is my happy place. nice ring to it….yep i think so.

so, as i reflected on this day of mine. I remembered a few things. I am never going to be perfect. My children wont remember in the morning, because they look at each day as new. Every day IS new. I am forgiven. I need humility. I am not a failure. I am doing fine as things are right now. Every day is a gift……

Love you all, Faith

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